It’s hard to imagine a more difficult time than the weeks after pregnancy loss. The grief, sadness and anger can seem insurmountable at times. These are normal feelings for anyone who has experienced this type of tragedy in their life. Coping with these feelings is an integral part of the healing process following a miscarriage or stillbirth. This post will offer some tips on how to cope with negative thoughts and emotions you may experience during your recovery period from pregnancy loss.
Stop Listening to Negativity
Your friends and family may be very supportive, but there will come a time when your friends and family start saying things like “it’s for the best” or “God had other plans.” These types of comments are well-intended, but they can send you on a downward spiral into hopelessness and despair. It’s important that you begin to separate yourself from any negativity surrounding your loss. Distancing yourself from these types of comments will make it a lot easier to manage your feelings as they come up over the next few weeks and months.
Don’t Rush Into Making Big Decisions
After a loss, it’s easy to rush into making decisions that will forever affect your life. Rushing into any big decisions during the recovery process can lead to more stress and anxiety. It may be tempting to think that you will never be able to move past this devastating tragedy if you don’t “move on” quickly, but rushing into big decisions will only lead to more pain and stress.
Consider Identifying Your Triggers
Maybe you experience a lot of anxiety when thinking about your upcoming doctor’s appointment, or maybe it’s looking at pictures of your older children that makes you cry. It’s important to identify what your triggers are and how you can avoid them. Some women find it helpful to take a step back from their everyday life while they’re going through the recovery process, which makes avoiding triggers a little bit easier.
Seek Out Professional Help If You Need It
Reaching out for help is never a sign of weakness. It’s important for you to reach out and get the emotional support you need to cope with your loss. You can simply start by talking about your feelings openly with family and friends or even seek out a therapist who will help you work through this difficult time.
Know That It Gets Better
After a pregnancy loss, feelings of grief and sadness can seem like they will last forever. You may be afraid that you will never feel happy again or wonder if you will ever be able to enjoy life the way you did before your loss occurred. The truth is that it does get better. The pain may not go away, but eventually, you will be able to find joy once again. The key is to stay positive and know that you are on the path to recovery.
Stop Worrying About What Others Think
It’s easy to get caught up in fear of what others will think when you start reaching out for help or simply talk about your loss openly. This is a normal part of the grieving process, but you need to learn how to stop worrying so much about what other people are thinking. The best thing you can do is be honest about your feelings and open up to others. The more you talk about what you’re going through, the better it will be for your recovery.
Take Time to Celebrate the Baby You Lost
It’s important that you take some time each week (or even each day) to celebrate the life of your baby and all of the joy it brought you while you were carrying it. This can be as simple as writing a letter or lighting a candle in remembrance of your baby. You can also wear a piece of jewelry that holds special meaning to you or hold onto something that once belonged to your baby, like a blanket or stuffed animal.
As you move forward in your pregnancy loss recovery process, we hope these tips can provide some ideas about how to cope with negative thoughts and emotions as they come up. Your thoughts and feelings are normal, so don’t get discouraged if you feel like you’re not moving forward. Recovery is never linear, but it will happen, and we are here to support your every step to recovery.